It’s been sort of a terrible week. I spent 3 hours waiting in a scary train station parking lot last night for Brian to navigate the broken down and delayed system back. I have received a quick rejection letter and am feeling downtrodden about it – my 16th this year. There is an army of ants who are attempting to take over my desk at work. Brian has been ill and I’ve been doing my best to take care of him when I’m actually home (which isn’t much). The weather is over 100 degrees and melty.
It’s one of those times where I wonder if running away like I tried when I was five is still possible. But most days I really like my life. The law of large numbers just insures that sometimes all the crap is stacked up in a single week like this.
I have been reading Storyteller by Kate Wilhelm, one of the founding teachers at the Clarion Writer’s Workshop. It’s a lovely book, part writing advice and part memoir, and it’s taught me some stuff already. You know, besides igniting all the regular yearnings to one day attend Clarion into a fervor. I’m going to rewrite the ending to the story that was rejected and see what happens next. I’m also itching to get my hands on some inexpensive used paperbacks so I can start dissecting the authors I love and see if I learn anything. Which I thought I would never voluntarily do.
Friday is my day, though. The Redlands bowl is having its last performance of the season, which means William Tell and fireworks. Totally my thing. Couple that with some kitten cuddles and I’m sure I’ll be feeling much better by the time next week rolls around.
Casey E. Hamilton 
Hang in there, beautiful cousin. Your words in this blog connect to the pain other’s feel after rejection but in such a hope-filled voice that I’m guessing they feel lighter, as I do, from reading them.
Hope things get better, they usually do. Sending my best wishes… Tilly.
Aww… thanks guys! I’m charging ahead. Sometimes you need a little complaining to move forward. 🙂
The ants… I think we have been ant free for about 6 weeks after having constant trouble for a year. What finally ended up working was having pest control apply the bait gel to ever nook and cranny the ants were coming out of. The barrier and regular bait traps worked not at all.
For the rest, I find that the hotter it gets and the more free time I have that I start to notice all the “things”. I think they are always present, but the heat makes them more aggravating and free time makes them more noticeable.
Sorry about the rejection letters, but you are leaps and bounds ahead of people like me who just think about writing. Do you listen to Writing Excuses? I believe they have one or two episodes about such letters. Also just a fun 15 minute listen.
Yeah, we’ve had them off and on at work I guess for a couple of summers. This is my first one here. The only thing that’s consistently worked is some experimental thing the Entomology department gave us.
I don’t yet listen to Writing Excuses, but I now have to start! My favorite rejection letter story is the Chair of Rejection http://fictionaut.com/stories/stacey-richter/the-chair-of-rejection. 🙂