Brian and I had a, well, interesting break. We had one giddy day of fun down in San Juan Capistrano. We took the train down, roamed the Mission gardens, ate lunch at the best little Italian café in the old train station building, and then wandered the kitschy shops before hopping the train home again. I trounced Brian at Lost Cities, and then he trounced me at Love Letter.
The rest of vacation we spent putting the house in order. I did massive dishes, put the all-year decorations up after the Christmas decorations came down (thanks Brian!), and cleaned out my closet. Brian dug up sprinkler lines, marveled at the stupidity and redundancy of them, and then installed a billion anti-siphon valves (okay, just 4) so all the random cut-off lines we found can be useable lines. I feel a lot of gardening in my future. In between, there was much catching up with friends, tons of cookies, and a little bit of D&D.
I am NOT ready to come back to work. It’s times like these I wish I was independently wealthy.
I am tripping along on my resolutions. One of my gifts was a Kindle, and I am THRILLED with the way it syncs to Goodreads. So much easier than trying to put them in one by one as I finish them. I think getting to 100 books will be easier than ever this year. I have written 3 of 4 days of the new year, too. Considering a couple of those days were weekends (when I usually don’t write), so that’s pretty good.
It feels right to be back in the swing of things, though, in some ways. I’m looking forward to the new year, and all the things it will bring.
Why do I always have such a hard time writing a blog entry lately? It’s not like lots hasn’t happened. I guess I’m just not ready to tell the world about my woes, and not just because I don’t really want to talk about it. It’s a little embarrassing. I don’t want to come off as a complainer. I have this need to pretend that I am a triumphant adult living a perfect life when the reality is quite different. Especially now that I won’t have a job in three months.
Yes, that’s right. You heard me. Chapman University is reorganizing their entire University Advancement division. My position is one of the several being eliminated. They will not give us a concrete time frame, but they said it will be at least two months and maybe three. The Dean told me they would keep me as long as they could manage, but that it was mostly out of his control.
You would think I should be distraught. I’m not.
I can claim to be worried. I can claim to be weary. The last thing I want to spend my time doing is applying for jobs. It takes hours to write a good cover letter, and then I send it all out into the vacuum of the internet and never hear back. I do this several times a week, and maybe I will hear from one place in the three months before I’m out of a job, student loan debts still clamoring to be paid. It’s enough to make a girl give up and agree to live in abject poverty the rest of her life. None of the other options seem to be working.
But as much as I loathe the thought of a job search, I relish the idea of being in a new job. Maybe I could get a job in Claremont without a three hour commute. I could walk to work, or buy that teal beach cruiser. I could work one job with a real live lunch hour instead of rushing from busy job #1 to busy job #2 with only minutes to spare. And it could be much worse. I still have job #1. I may have to scrimp and save my pennies, but I will be able to pay the rent. I won’t starve. I have a bevy of people willing to give me good references.
The uncertainty is what’s killing me most. Is this a good thing or a bad thing? I just don’t know. It’s too early to tell. So I cling to good and hope it comes true.
I have a feeling the phrase “blessing in disguise,” is about to come out of my mouth about five million times.